According to Santrock (2006) parenting requires interpersonal skills and makes emotional demands, yet there is little formal education for this task.
Diana Baumrind(1971) suggested that parents should be neither punitive nor aloof, rather they should develop rules for their children and be affectionate with them, she identified four types of childrearing styles.
Authoritarian childrearing; is a restrictive punitive style in which parents exhort the child to follow their directions and respect their work and effort. The authoritarian parents places firm limit and control on the child and allow little verbal exchange. For example, an authoritarian parent might say, you do it my way or else. An authoritarian parent might spank the child frequently, enforce rules rigidly but not explain them, and show rage towards the child. Children of authoritarian parents are often unhappy, fearful, and anxious a lot comparing themselves with others, they often fail to initiate activity, and have weak communication skills.
Authoritative childrearing; encourages children to be independent but still places limits and controls on their actions. The extensive verbal give-and-take is allowed and parents are warm and nurturant toward the child. An authoritarian parent might put his arm around the child in a comforting way and say ‘you know you should not have done that, let's talk about how you can handle the situation next time. Authoritative parents support children’s constructive behavior. They also expect mature, independent, and age-appropriate behavior from children. Children whose parents are authoritative are often cheerful, controlled, self-reliant, and achievement-oriented, they maintain friendly relations with peers, cooperate with adults, and cope well with stress.
Neglectful childrearing; is a style in which the parent is very uninvolved in the child’s life. Children whose parents are neglective develop the sense that other aspects of their parents' lives are more important than they are. These children tend to be socially incompetent. Many have poor self-control and don’t handle independence well. They frequently have low self-esteem, are immature, and maybe alienated from the family. In adolescence, they may show patterns of truancy and delinquency.
Indulgent parenting; is a style of parenting in which parents are very involved with their children but place few demands and control on them. These parents let their children do what they want, children never learn to control their own behaviour and always expect to get their way, some parents deliberately rear their children in this way because they believe that the combination of warm involvement and few restraints will produce a creative, confident child. However, children whose parents are indulgent rarely learn respect for others and have difficulty controlling their behaviours. They might be domineering, egocentric, non-compliant, and have difficulties in peer relations.
These four styles of childrearing involve a combination of acceptance and responsiveness on the one hand and demand and control on the other. Research studies continue to document more punitive links between authoritative childrearing and the well-being of children and adolescents than the other three types of childrearing styles (Slicker and Thornberry, 2003). The evidence linking authoritative childrearing with competence on the part of the child has been found in research across a wide range of ethnic groups, social statuses, cultures, and family structures (Steinberg & Silk, 2002).
I will prefer the authoritative style if I ever become a parent @John. T